1
Communicate
Aside from opposable thumbs, advanced
communication is a critical component of the human
species that has allowed us to advance over time.
Without effective communication, wars are waged,
walls are built, and relationships crumble.
The same can be said of marriage. If you aren’t
effectively communicating with your partner — how you feel, if you need more
sleep, when you need a date night — the basics of human interaction
can fall apart and leave you feeling isolated, alone, and on the road to
nowhere.
But if you learn to talk to your partner, and
listen in return, your goals and dreams will remain aligned and the “growing
apart” that some couples experience will likely not happen.
2 Laugh
always
Go ahead, fart in bed. Got kids? Put a stuffed
animal or action figure in your spouses’ side of the bed as a surprise. (It’s
gotta be under the covers to work effectively. Trust me, it’s hilarious.)
Always make each other laugh. It releases stress
and it’s just straight up fun.
Don’t ever take anything too seriously. Smiles
and laughter make the world go ’round. Plus, laughing and smiling
releases endorphins — you know, the feel good chemical? Yes.
3 Marry
your friend
If you don’t know the person before getting
married, how is it possible to forge ahead with similar life goals and
aspirations? It’s probably not, right?
Sure, it works for some people. But in this day
and age, it’s easier to get to know someone before taking the plunge than
it was during the Baby Boom (and prior) generation.
4 Respect
one another
Along with communicating and marrying your friend
is knowing when to let your better half be.
If I’m having a bad day, I might shy away from my
husband’s kiss when he returns home from work.
It’s not that I don’t love him and it’s not that
I’m mad at him. It’s that I just need to be.
He knows that about me and I’m sure the rejection
stings, but he knows I’ll get out of the funk shortly and he lets it go.
He respects my right to be grumpy. Likewise, when
I can see him brewing with irritation, stress, or anger, I let him be. Because
we all need that time sometimes — and it’s normal.
Even if you don’t necessarily understand the
other person — their emotions, their position in the argument, etc. — mutual
respect is of the utmost importance.
5 Don’t go
to bed angry
Some couples can do the “go to bed mad” thing. We
cannot. Well, I cannot. Maybe he can.
But if I’m stewing about something, I won’t
sleep. It’s ineffective for us as a couple to attempt to go to bed angry.
Luckily most of our fights happen during daylight
hours but when we were first dating our fights happened at night. It was not
awesome, let me tell you.
6 Check
your ego at the door
In marriage, you’re not allowed to have an
ego. You’re a team.
If there’s an ego, it’s a collective ego and you
get to share it.
One person is not better than the other. Work
together, listen to each other, and when things get tough (and they will),
remember why you married each other in the first place.
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